This Emotional Life

"For the INTP, emotions are seen as something mysterious and as uncontrollable as they are unalterable. Hence, the root of the fear of emotions is the fear that they cannot be controlled. Hence, when an INTP does finally respond emotionally to something, his emotions are indeed left uncontrolled, raw and open. However, when witnessing the emotional response of another person, the INTP intensely resists any similar emotion of his own. An example of this is when watching a 'weepy' cinema film in which some heart-wrenching scene is being shown. The INTP despises the attempt by the filmmaker to influence his emotions and is more likely to sneer than cry."

True. However -

"When an INTP female's feeling side does surface, it often does so with an intensity, an outpouring that can be frightening to both herself and others."

Incessantly Needing To Ponder

I find most people of college-age have heard of the Meyers-Briggs test at some point in their life. (If not, JFGI.) I became fascinated with this bit of statistic-ry foolishness back when I was a first year university student. To the surprise of no one who knows me, I tested then, and still test now, as an INTP.

Introverted iNtutive Thinking Percieving.

Basically, this means that I really suck at maintaining social relationships (because I don't do well with emotion, but also because I simply don't care much of the time and can't really be bothered). I am analytical to a fault about almost everything in my life. I have an idiosyncratic sense of humor. Once decided, I fall swiftly and irrevocably in love - and expect my partner to put up with various oddities to boot. Competency takes precedence to repeated experience in a subject. And stupidity in others is not only sneered at, but openly mocked and prodded with what I'm sure most people would see as a measure of arrogance abnormal to decent society.

Whee! Okay, so I have exaggerated faults and deficiencies. We're all unique and wonderful snowflakes, blah blah. INTP profiles really do describe me quite well, however, and I often find myself taking shelter in their conclusions when I feel guilty and/or ashamed of something I've done in relation to other people. I only wanted to bring this up now, because I'm sure it's something I'm going to reference a lot in an attempt to explain why I do the things I do. (And this is a habit I indulge often due to my analytical nature.)

This probably helps explain why I have a need to constantly jot down my random thoughts. And my smirks and cocked eyebrows when people take pictures of me.

Really I don't think of myself as arrogant at all. Elitist to a fault, sure. Most of that is the product of my excellent childhood and education from my parents. I am an incredibly self-confident individual, and make no apologies for it. Most of the time I find it difficult to understand why other people aren't on the same level when it comes to assurance in themselves. When I get taken down a peg though, it sure smarts. Heh.

This is just a post I've been meaning to put up for awhile. There will be more notes about it later.